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URBANNA — Four decades of writing One Woman’s Opinion columns provided many lessons about both writing and life. One lesson learned almost immediately is if one wanted to write opinion, fine, but he couldn’t just choose the easy soft issues like preferring chocolate over vanilla or that children ought to be taught good manners.
As pleasant as such cream puff subjects might be to write, such writing would be a colossal waste of time. Who needs more inane writing in the media today?
Probably the most controversial opinion that caused the greatest outrage was my columns in the 90s calling to open the Virginia Military Institute (VMI) in Lexington to qualified women.
I wrote it was time for women capable of managing the rugged requirements at VMI to have the same opportunities to earn a commission in the armed forces at graduation as did men. Just as the practice was already in place at the U.S. Naval Academy in Annapolis, Md., and the U.S. Military Academy in West Point, N.Y.
This position caused instant uproar. One Woman faced the toughest opponents of all — VMI students, alumni and even more ferocious, their wives.
I stood out as a sole target as no other columnist in the commonwealth at the time had taken such a fearful position. And for good reason. Facing the barrage of opposition was not especially pleasant. I believe I was the first woman in Virginia to experience and survive its infamous rat system — and I didn’t even receive a commission in the armed forces.
I heard from many angry and dedicated troops pressuring me to back down on my stance. I was even shunned at social events. To no avail. There is nothing more determined than a feminist.
One day I even received a present in the mail — VMI boxer shorts, size 58. I laughed. I guessed the sender did not like my opinion?
What amazed me was the fury of women. How dare I debase VMI by including women cadets! The passion was impressive. They believed that aspiring women working in a highly disciplined military environment would ruin the school.
After a year when I was as popular in Middlesex County as a rattlesnake just arrived from across river, a new voice spoke out supporting women going to VMI — then-Gov. Gerald Baliles. He saved me. It was time, he said, for VMI to open its doors to women.
In 1995 the Citadel accepted S. Faulkner into the freshman class only to discover she was female. She was able to attend as a day student for several semesters but had to sue the school in order to join the Corps.
She finally won the right to do so and in 1996 federal marshals escorted her to school. Regardless, in the 100-degree temperatures that August, she ended up in the infirmary by week’s end.
I remember watching on TV as she stood in the rain announcing she had quit. Citadel troops could be seen rejoicing in the background. (She transferred to another college, author Pat Conroy paid for her college education, and she is now teaching in North Carolina.)
In 1996 the Supreme Court ruled state supported military schools had to give equal opportunities to women. I never heard another complaint on my position on VMI.
Another highly controversial topic came up several years ago when several members of the Middlesex County Board of Supervisors suggested the county move the monument to the Confederate dead at the Middlesex Historic Courthouse.
This seemed to me as an outrageous assault on American history if not Middlesex County history and I wrote in support of letting the memorials to the dead in past wars rest in peace.
Not only should we respect and care for memorials to our war dead just as we hope future generations will care for ours, but such memorials deliver a constant message to younger generations never to forget tragic lessons learned from past wars.
The county agreed with One Woman and voted their wishes in a referendum. Those who wanted the monument left at the courthouse won with almost 77 percent of the vote.
Another lesson learned was I should change an opinion when facts and circumstances change.
The issue of abortion is an example. As a feminist, I once approved abortion in all cases, but as the years passed I discovered abortion was being used mainly as a method of birth control. And I was no longer a feminist. I wanted to improve opportunities for all people and not just women — and that includes the life of a fetus that has developed to the point it can live independently of the uterus.
Women have a need for safe abortion services for various reasons, but there is also a time in a pregnancy when the fetus also has a right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness — just like the rest of us. We need to arrive at a compromise to settle this issue.
I never write a One Woman’s Opinion guest column for the Sentinel without thinking how fortunate we are to have the right of freedom of expression. Long live our American tradition of differing opinions!
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